If you’re like me, you’ve had your moments of anxiety. Sometimes, you may not even realize that certain behaviors and habits are adding to your anxious feelings.
I didn’t always know how my actions were contributing to my anxiety. I just thought I was naturally an anxious person. It wasn’t until I started digging deeper that I realized my behaviors played a big part.
Anxiety isn’t simply a personality trait, it’s a mental health condition. And though we all experience it differently, some common behaviors can unintentionally amplify it.
Let’s take a closer look at these behaviors, because understanding them can be the first step towards managing your anxiety more effectively.
1) Overthinking everything
Have you ever found yourself replaying conversations in your head, wondering if you said something wrong?
Or maybe you spend hours worrying about the future and all the things that could go wrong.
This is called overthinking and it’s a common behavior that can ramp up your anxiety levels.
I used to do this all the time. I thought it was just part of my personality, but I didn’t realize that this constant rumination was making me more anxious. It’s like being stuck in a loop of worry and doubt, and it can be exhausting.
Overthinking isn’t a sign that you care more or that you’re more intelligent. It’s actually a form of self-sabotage. It keeps you stuck in the problem, instead of finding solutions or letting things go.
The problem with overthinking is that it can make you feel like you’re trapped in your own head. It can lead to feelings of anxiety and can even make you feel physically ill.
So, if you find yourself overthinking everything, remember: it’s a behavior that contributes to your anxiety, not a personality trait. Recognizing this is the first step towards managing it better.
2) Seeking constant reassurance
We all need reassurance sometimes. It’s normal to look for validation or comfort from others when we’re feeling unsure or nervous.
But what if I told you that constantly seeking reassurance might actually be adding to your anxiety?
When I was dealing with my own anxiety, I found myself constantly asking for reassurance. I needed to know I was doing things right, that everything was going to be okay. It seemed like a good coping mechanism at the time.
However, this constant need for reassurance can actually create a cycle of anxiety. Instead of building self-confidence, you become reliant on others for your sense of peace and security. And when that reassurance isn’t there, anxiety can spike.
The key is to learn how to reassure yourself. It’s about building your own inner resilience and self-confidence, instead of relying on others to soothe your fears.
It’s not easy, but it’s an important step towards managing your anxiety in a healthier way.
3) Avoiding uncomfortable situations
No one really enjoys uncomfortable situations. We naturally tend to avoid discomfort, as it makes us feel uneasy or anxious. However, this avoidance can actually increase our anxiety in the long run.
When we consistently avoid situations that make us uncomfortable, we’re not giving ourselves the chance to face and overcome our fears. This can create a feedback loop in our brain where the fear becomes more ingrained each time we avoid it.
Exposure therapy, a common method used in cognitive behavioral therapy, is based on the principle that facing our fears helps us to reduce anxiety. It works by gradually and repeatedly exposing us to the things we fear and avoid, thereby helping us to confront and cope with these feelings over time.
So, ironically, by avoiding uncomfortable situations, we’re reinforcing our anxiety. Instead of running from discomfort, facing it head-on can help us become more resilient and less anxious in the long run.
4) Neglecting self-care
Life can be busy. Sometimes, amidst all the hustle and bustle, we forget to take care of ourselves.
We might skip meals, lose sleep, or forget to take time for relaxation. It’s easy to put self-care on the back burner when we have so much else going on.
But here’s the thing: self-care is not a luxury, it’s a necessity.
When we neglect our own needs, we’re more vulnerable to stress and anxiety. We might think we’re saving time or being more productive, but in reality, we’re depleting our mental and physical energy.
Giving yourself permission to rest, to eat well, and to engage in activities you enjoy is not selfish – it’s essential for your mental well-being.
By taking care of your own needs, you’re actually equipping yourself with the energy and resilience needed to navigate life’s challenges.
5) Being a perfectionist
Ever found yourself obsessing over the smallest details, striving to make everything just right?
Maybe you’ve spent hours on a project, determined to get it perfect, even when it’s already pretty good. This is the hallmark of a perfectionist.
Perfectionism might seem like a good thing at first glance. After all, who doesn’t want to do their best?
But when you’re constantly striving for perfection, it can lead to immense pressure and, yes, heightened anxiety.
When we set unrealistically high standards for ourselves, we’re setting ourselves up for stress and disappointment. We start to fear making mistakes and this fear can snowball into full-blown anxiety.
It’s important to remember that it’s okay not to be perfect. We all make mistakes and that’s part of being human. Striving for excellence is admirable, but allowing room for error can go a long way in managing anxiety and reducing stress.
6) Not setting boundaries
Once upon a time, I was the person who always said “yes”.
Whether it was a last-minute project at work, an impromptu gathering with friends, or a favor for a neighbor, I was always there. I thought being agreeable and helpful would keep stress at bay, but boy, was I wrong.
Not setting boundaries with others can lead to feeling overwhelmed and anxious. When we constantly put others’ needs before our own, it can leave us feeling drained and stressed.
It wasn’t until I learned to say “no” that I started to see a decrease in my anxiety levels. Setting boundaries helped me manage my time better and gave me the space to focus on my own needs as well.
Learning to set boundaries is a crucial step towards reducing anxiety. It’s about respecting your own time and energy, and understanding that it’s okay to prioritize your wellbeing.
7) Procrastinating
Let’s face it – we’ve all been guilty of procrastination at one point or another.
You put off a task, thinking you’ll do it later, but then ‘later’ becomes ‘never’. You might think you’re just giving yourself a break, but in reality, you’re just adding to your pile of stress.
Procrastination is essentially a delay tactic that can feed your anxiety. As the undone tasks pile up, so does your anxiety. It becomes a cycle – you feel anxious about the tasks you’ve put off, which makes you avoid them further, which then increases your anxiety even more.
Here’s the hard truth: procrastination won’t make your tasks disappear. They’ll just hang over your head like a dark cloud, causing unnecessary stress and anxiety.
So roll up your sleeves and tackle those tasks head on. The sense of accomplishment you’ll feel afterwards is worth it, and it will help keep your anxiety in check.
8) Ignoring your emotions
We all experience a range of emotions – joy, sadness, anger, fear.
But sometimes, we might try to ignore or suppress the uncomfortable ones. You might think that pushing these emotions away will make them disappear, but the opposite is often true.
Ignoring your emotions doesn’t make them go away. It just buries them, allowing them to bubble up later, often in the form of anxiety.
By acknowledging your feelings – even the uncomfortable ones – you can process them in a healthier way and reduce your anxiety.
Remember: It’s okay to feel what you feel. Emotions are a normal part of life and acknowledging them is a key step in managing anxiety.
Pay attention to your feelings, embrace them, and let yourself process them in your own time. This self-awareness can help reduce anxiety and lead to better mental health in the long run.
Conclusion
Understanding and managing anxiety is a journey, and it’s different for everyone. This article has illuminated some of the behaviors that might be unknowingly fueling your anxiety.
However, it’s important to remember that recognizing these behaviors is just the first step. The real challenge lies in making changes, and it’s a challenge that only you can undertake.
The time you spend understanding yourself, your behaviors and your emotions is never wasted. It’s an investment in your mental health and your overall well-being.
To truly manage anxiety means to be brave enough to face these behaviors, and to make the necessary changes, without letting anyone else decide what’s best for you.
Here’s to a journey of self-discovery, self-improvement, and ultimately, a less anxious life!
